We went to Las Vegas with a group of girls for Sam's bachelorette party.
We danced our hearts out, scootered with strangers, swam like 8 year olds (honestly surprised we didn't play Marco Polo at a pool party and equally disappointed that we didn't), and ate our hearts out for three days. So here is the story behind the cannonball.
I want to take it back to when things truly started to get weird for this trip...and quite frankly, it all started on the way to the airport. In a limo. We all rode in a limo to the Stockton airport...and also the Sacramento airport...on accident. We got a limo to drive us to the Stockton airport (only about a 40 minute drive) and we were drinking champagne and laughing our faces off and about an hour and a half into the drive we realized we were FAR past Stockton and our limo driver was driving us to the WRONG AIRPORT. We quickly transitioned into the scene from Home Alone when the family is running through the airport to "Run Run Rudolph" and made our flight just in time. *we all scream YAY!*
The first night we went to a subzero ice bar. I (Carisah) didn't make it because I had a gnarly migraine. Ironically, now I live in an actual ice bar from November-March each year (shout out to Iowa! what's gewwwwd, bebe gurl?!)
The next day we got invited to a pool party at one of the hotels/clubs...with a complimentary cabana and free bottle service. Most girls roll up to these parties in bedazzled bikinis, high heels, jewelry, and hair and make up done like they're ready for the Miss America pageant....we were not those girls. We basically walked 100 miles to this pool from where we were staying and showed up dripping sweat, in jean cutoff shorts, no make up, Birkenstocks, and holes in our shirts. You know that scene on Mean Girls when Cady Herring shows up to the shed while Janice and Damien are watching the scary movie on Halloween and they freak out? That's how I picture people looking at us roll up to the club.
We weren't there to impress anyone. We were just there to have a great time. And HOW DO YOU HAVE A GREAT TIME AT A POOL PARTY?!
WITH A CANNONBALL...
I (completely sober) pulled a Ham from Sandlot and went to the edge of the pool and yelled at the top of my lungs "CANNONBALL!" and proceeded to perform a perfect Cannonball. The crowd was already going wild (because #vegas) but I like to pretend it was in response to my performance. After high fiving my friends and signing autographs, I quickly turn around to see one of the Security Guards cannonball into the pool on the opposite side of us and start to HAUL. I thought he was entering to save someone's life based off of the urgency of the cannonball but then quickly realized home boy was headed directly to me. He quickly approached me (an innocent cannonballer) with "MS! YOU CANNOT CANNONBALL HERE!"
First of all, I, along with all of Las Vegas just witnessed his hypocritical cannonball. And second, I responded with the most solid argument in the history of ever with "I THOUGHT THIS WAS A POOL PARTY, SIR?!" He said "Not that kind of pool party, ma'am. There are people with open drink containers and blah blah blah." After tuning out his reasoning I responded with "SOME PARTY!" and then got a verbal warning that if I cannonballed again, I would get kicked out. (hahahaha) I then proceeded to live a life of someone I am not, acting completely calm and composed in a swimming pool for the next four hours...but then we went to McDonald's and everything was fine again.
Sam, is that you?
The infamous limo driver taking us to TWO different air ports! Had to take a picture with him to document the almost ruined trip before the trip even started.